You ever have one of those days where things are going wrong? I don’t mean you keep dropping stuff, or forgetting tasks or biting that saaaaaame spot on the corner of your cheek. Naw homie. I’m talking about the worst symptoms are banging down the front door of your peace of mind. For me, it’s the combination of foot neuropathy and the Parkinson’s like shaking. The LAST time I suffered that duo, I got off FB for 2mo. 😑 Like the kids in New York City, “REAL TALK SON. WORD IS BOND. WORD UP”. *claps loudly three times* I’ve since learned that specific symptoms trigger anxiety attacks. Anxiety makes MS jealous so MS sends more symptoms. Anxiety ain’t no punk tho. It goes for jugular, panicked, short breathes. YES! It really gets THAT deep. GURL. I’m saying the lil handicapped homie be struggling. All that stuff is just the physical. Remember, we’re here because it’s an emotional day and everything is going wrong.
On these emotional days, I know keeping my head full keeps my heart straight. 💨🥃😉 Let me write that again in case somebody reading it slow. Ready? Keeping my head full, keeps my heart straight. 🎯 In NO particular order, here we… (I remix the order based how my body is feeling, pain levels, blah blah blah.)
Audiobook, Podcast or Music
When I know it’s my emotions playing games, pushing buttons and wrecking my flow, I start with an aggressive, self-improvement audiobook. Why? On these days, I can’t trust my own thoughts. I live and die by Ghandi’s positive thoughts->positive words->positive behavior->positive habits->positive values->positive destiny. On these days, I’m a nervous wreck, think my clock is speeding up, crying and snotting, sobbing and shaking, I don’t want people around, whew. Today, I jammed Charlemagne The God’s Black Privilege and it worked perfect. If I don’t have the preferred audio book or podcast, I go with chopped and screwed, old school R&B. If the music is too aggressive on these days, it negatively affects my mood and my mood is priority number one. ~Keeping my head full keeps my heart straight.~
I’m new to the tea game but I’ll tell you this, there is something therapeutic to the art of boiling a bag, waiting for it to cool just a tad, allowing the tea to steep for the recommended time and slow sipping to avoid burning TF outta your damn self. ☕ The entire process is tedious than a mug. You aren’t getting that much final product. The taste is best described as ‘acquired’ yet the process is what helps me the most. I’m rocking my audiobook, thinking better and settling down with hot ass tea makes me chill out. I might start reading something, writing something or maybe just stare out the window and watch grass grow. Either way, I’m doing it slow and steady while pumping good vibes into my head. ~Keeping my head full keeps my heart straight.~
Yoga is always a key piece of my day. Waking up, working out, manufactoring energy, shhhhiiiiiid, sleeping are all different routines, stretches and times. For emotional days, I have a gentle, extended set of poses. For about 35-45min, I’m doing and holding poses and positions mostly seated or laying down. NAW playa, da lil handicapped homie is not here levitating on one foot/hand/head. I’m not hanging off nothing. I’m not upside down. None of that stuff EVER! 🤣🤣🤣 Again, yoga for nice amount of time, enough to feel the burn of the present but not pay for stuff tomorrow. Why yoga when I’m feeling emotional? With the strong-armed audiobook/podcast directing my focus on self-improvement, I’m able to lose myself in yoga and be presently acting upon that focus. I plan for 35-45min but on these emotional days with my mind on getting better due to the sound I’ve chosen, I’ll often finish my yoga after a solid hour. Yeah, like that. I’m saying I’ve learned to channel the emotional energy into a better work out as long as something directs my thoughts. ~Keeping my head full keeps my heart straight.~
Much like yoga; Dawg, I meditate every day. Usually, I meditate immediately following my yoga sessions. Today tho, emotional days, I meditate in the shower. I know you’re wondering why but first, I sit on the floor or my shower chair. Look, meditating in the shower is about safety so know WHERE before even considering what I do. Yup, I have fallen. Yup, it hurt. Nope, nothing broken, only bruises. Of course I learned, it’s why I have a shower chair! Now, the why. Honestly, it’s because if I’m going to cry, I prefer to cry in the shower. In my world, I’m playing the podcast/audiobook/music in the bathroom on speaker phone. I attempt a BM (🤷🏾♂️ get that shit out), shave the beard, manscape, the whole shi-bang and shower because of Deion Sanders. Y’all know the NFL’s Hall of Fame cornerback #21? He said, “if you look good, you feel good. Feel good, play good. Play good, paid GOOD.” Well, that’s why I meditate in the shower. Something about the hot water and hot emotions bring out tears for me. On accident, I’ve learned that relaxing and meditating under that hot water makes it easier to calm down. The water is smacking your face, waterfall’ing down your body and you’re focusing on holding and releasing your breath without inhaling a stream of droplets. Just writing it out warms my soul! If tears do start, I’m safe in the shower to sob away without questions or worse, seeing myself before I’ve cleaned up. ~Keeping my head full keeps my heart straight.~