Yup. Not proud but….hey, we all slip on our growth. To my credit, it wasn’t for urges. I was NOT fiending for a drink. Life just stole a couple of points but I bounced back.
See, what had happened was threefold, busy (which everyone is), pain (#MSWarriors SALUTE) and sudden fear. I’m a Realtor, Houston, TX Realtor, recent Hurricane Harvey Headquarters and keep my 4yr old daughter, Wisdom, to save a few dollars. After the storm, I’m crazy busy trying to find flood victims a home. You would think, “Dude, make money and hustle.”. The problem is good people have bad credit, criminal records, limited funds, broken leases or whatever else. Owners still aren’t giving good people a pass. I can spend 4 or 5 days calling, emailing, texting, scanning, waiting; FINALLY get approval and clients don’t have the reduced/split deposit! Grinding to house good people is hard work that rarely pays out. Insert: I gotta feed my kids. That being said, I go hard when I think good people are serious. So, I’m busy and that’s everyone. Busy is relative matter, blah, blah, blu, you too. Does anyone get annoyed when your kid begins asking the same question and back door, in a whiny voice, with, “BUT WHY?”. Then, said child, will have the audacity, some say bravery, to drag out that y sound? Ok, you feeling me? Now, this *insert your adjective*, will silently FOLLOW you around, somewhere, anywhere, everywhere on the outskirts of your peripheral vision. If you don’t get it; well, blessed and highly favored to you. So, that’s going on. You know that crick in the neck you get sometimes? The one that makes driving a hazard because you damn near can’t turn your head and check blind spots? When you accidentally do, you almost collapse and lose breath for a second? That was my pain, except that crick pain was from the middle of the back of my head, between my ears, and ran down my spine just past my shoulder blades. This disrespectful pain extends in a slim horizontal line across the area where neck and shoulders meet. Basically, I’m describing a cross. It’s not for a second or two, its for hours. On a scale of 1-10, I’m rocking a solid 6. I had just written my Day 3 of 7 WITHOUT alcohol blog and bragged that I was good because I was. THAT pain hadn’t hit and when it does; I know I’m little use for a few hours. I finished the blog, went back and forth with a customer on life insurance (Did I forget to mention I educate and protect families as a licensed insurance professional?) and geared up for some more #oneloverealestate with a bowl of broccoli soup, courtesy and appreciation to the wife. THAT pain hit me and I suddenly realized how UNDERinsured I was. I’m building my brand, knee deep in Harvey stories, needing to focus on income driven activity and I’m terrified what could happen if THAT pain lasts any longer than its usual 3 or 4 hours or catches me driving. It was the first thing on my mind after, “Heeeeellll Naaaaw! Not THAT pain now”. I’m underinsured like millions of others but the MS diagnosis makes correcting it an expensive pipe dream. I calmly poured my self recommended dosage and watched the grass grow from my back porch.
What else I could do? My eldest daughter made the plates for the other 3 kids and the routine of chores, homework, baths requires little supervision. All I could do was lay low in a quiet spot and referee as needed. Busy, fear and pain will do strange things to anybody. Did the alcohol help? I spent the next couple hours saving and downloading positive quotes, memes, thingsIlearnedtoday stuff, verses and decided on my next audiobook. My most recent was terrible but I refuse to bash it. I deleted so quickly that I’ll end up downloading it again. But did the alcohol help? That session of positive energy gave me a great idea for my tattoo. I’m proud of all my tats, even tatted my brand, oneloverealestate, on my right forearm. Call it what you want, bad, symbolic, expression, immaturity, I love tats. I’m thinking I should tat my mantra and Ghandi quote. See, this is usual thing to alleviate tough days. I have a drink or whatever and feast on positive imagery. Wait, did the alcohol help? Absolutely and I haven’t had a drink since… Day 5 doesn’t count.
Link to Day 7!